Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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