I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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