I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
