i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
