Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Boobs are out for the taking
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Randomize
