Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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