I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize