Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
wat bout pragnant strippers??
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
