I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
