so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
