I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
