he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize