I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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