all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
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