Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
