Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
