she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
