Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Randomize
