Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize