Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
