I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
