tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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