Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
