Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
