I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
