I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize