Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
