No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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