All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
