theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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