Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
