Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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