we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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