Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
