yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
and you fell through a lawn chair
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
