last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
handjob tips. give me some.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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