Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
