found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize