Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
he thought i was a dude.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
