if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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