I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I believe in your delicious
Randomize
