dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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