trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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