O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
