That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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