Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
