I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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