whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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