You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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