i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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